It’s been two years since Arie Luyendyk graced our TV screens as probably the most boring Bachelor in historical past, and I’ve to say, I don’t actually miss him. Watching Arie and Lauren fall in love (sorry, Becca) was arguably much less thrilling than watching paint dry, however hey, it looks like issues are actually figuring out for them. I like that. Two years after assembly on the present, they’re married, they’ve a daughter collectively, and now, the primary home that they’re flipping collectively is formally available on the market. Fortunately, somebody posted the Zillow itemizing in a Fb group I’m in, and boy is it one thing.
I’m no actual property skilled, and after perusing the itemizing, I’ve a number of questions. First, let’s go over a number of the particulars. Arie and Lauren purchased the previous home in February of final 12 months, and did a whole tear-down and new construct. The brand new home has 4 bedrooms/three bogs, and is sort of 3,000 sq. toes, which by my calculations is *seems round* undoubtedly larger than my condominium. Nice, appears like a standard suburban home. Arie is listed proper there on Zillow because the itemizing agent, so it’s good to see he hasn’t let his Bachelor fame get in the way in which of his precise profession.
The factor that instantly caught my consideration is the asking value: $915,000. For these of us which can be numerically challenged, that’s nearly 1,000,000 {dollars}! It sounded excessive to me, so I did a bit digging. Arie and Lauren purchased the previous home on the lot for $298,500 in early 2019. Then, the brand new home was listed yesterday for $950,000. In line with Zillow’s calculations, that’s a value improve of over 200%. Rattling, do I must get into flipping homes? In all probability. Do I’ve the abilities? Positively not. Unusually, in lower than a full day of being available on the market, the worth on the home has already been lowered by $35ok, which looks like an odd technique? Perhaps it is a frequent tactic that I’m unaware of, however I’m gonna select to assume that Arie simply made a typo when placing within the value.
Zillow additionally has a characteristic known as the “Zestimate,” the place it tells you the estimated precise worth of a home. After I first noticed the itemizing final night time, the Zestimate on this home was a whopping $600ok decrease than the checklist value, however now it’s been up to date to simply over $900ok, so I’m guessing that was only a lag on the brand new itemizing. In truth, the Zestimate has continued to go up within the final hour or so, which is fascinating. However what’s actually fascinating is that the typical worth of a house on this neighborhood of Phoenix is round $360ok. That’s a huuuuuge distinction from Arie and Lauren’s just-shy-of-a-million asking value, and it makes me surprise why they constructed such a pleasant home on this neighborhood? My mother all the time informed me that you simply by no means need to have the most costly home within the neighborhood as a result of it hurts your property worth, and it seems like that’s precisely what these two have achieved. Oh effectively, not my drawback.
Now that I’ve achieved sufficient analysis to earn my actual property license, let’s speak sh*t about the home itself, as a result of I do know that’s why we’re all right here. From a primary look on the exterior, it seems like Arie and Lauren caught to the Vanderpump Guidelines architectural model of “off-white home with huge black storage door,” and is anybody shocked? I’m undecided about these unpainted picket beams surrounding the entrance door, however I suppose the country wooden offsets the sensation that your home seems such as you noticed it in a catalog and stated “I like that” (sorry, I’ll cease).
Shifting contained in the entrance door, you’re instantly greeted by an open-concept kitchen. And by instantly, I imply that the range is actually not more than six toes from the entrance door. Is that this a factor? I’ll say, the kitchen seems stunning. However all of the photographs are taken with that bizarre broad lens that’s presupposed to make every thing look larger, and it results in some sketchy Kylie Jenner Facetune points. Like, the kitchen island seems prefer it’s straight out of an MC Escher drawing, and I can’t inform how huge something is.
Within the preliminary submit I noticed about the home, one factor that many individuals known as out is the dearth of staging in these photographs. And I’ve to agree, some furnishings would have helped. In picture after picture, we simply see these huge, empty rooms, however as a result of bizarre fish-eye perspective, it’s actually laborious to get a deal with on how huge something is. I’m certain staging takes lots of money and time, however nonetheless, it could be useful to know what dimension mattress I may slot in every room, as an illustration.
However all of those complaints in regards to the format and the dearth of staging completely pale compared to what I’m about to indicate you. Brace your self, as a result of that is actually upsetting.
Behold, the corridor toilet:
WHAT. THE. F*CK. Oh my god, I’m gonna be sick. And I say that as a result of the tile seems like some form of bacterial an infection that’s quickly spreading into the hallway. I’m gonna maintain checking the Zillow itemizing, as a result of by this time tomorrow, it would take over the entire home! Who can cease the tile???
However really, who made this design choice? Joanna Gaines would by no means. Like, did they get 90% of the way in which via laying the flooring within the hallway and run out of wooden? Actually, that’s the one rationalization I can consider, as a result of that is gonna look so bizarre when the toilet door is closed. Additionally, the sting of the wall the place it meets the ground seems… form of sloppy? For that asking value, I’d count on all particulars to be flawless. I’m certain whoever buys this home will adore it, nevertheless it’s not the one for me, and never simply because I’ll by no means have $900,000.
If you happen to’re within the Phoenix space, there’s an open home tomorrow, and I’m actually begging you to go examine and report again. Does the home really look good? Can you determine why this tile state of affairs occurred? Is Arie going to observe you round the home when you cry in each room? I’ve by no means wanted solutions extra. Good luck to Arie and Lauren, and perhaps in the event that they’re fortunate, they’ll get an HGTV present out of this.
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Photos: Zillow (4)